Good at Waiting
by artemis-nz
Summary: Hokuto promised him death. Seishirou waits for the day. Vague Seishirou/Subaru.


She lived. Barely. He could see it was a struggle for her to keep her head upright, even with him half-supporting her. But still she smiled, just as he did.

_"I... want Subaru to live. I know that its kind of selfish. But he had a kind of suffering that felt like death... Even so, he still must live... Though he told me I was arrogant. But even so... I want you and Subaru to live."_

_"Why me as well? Subaru will suffer because I was the one that killed you."_

_"Yes, that's true. But I still feel that I don't want you to die. No matter how bad you become... Or how many you kill... I will still like you... He is the only one who can kill you. And you are the only one who can kill him. That's why... With my last strength I will cast a spell."_

After killing her, he became obsessed with death.

On reflection (he reflected a lot, on top of buildings in the rain with a thin trail of cigarette smoke ever spiralling upwards), he supposed most people would have said that he had already been obsessed. But he hadn't, not really. He killed people, but that was only a matter of course. The tree demanded blood, and he fed it. Sometimes he actively enjoyed it, and sometimes he felt nothing at all as the petals reddened, soaking up the life force hungrily.

But when she died... no, when he murdered her, that was when he became obsessed.

Obsession. He liked the word on his lips, the way it sounded. He said it aloud from pure pleasure. Subaru was _obsessed_ with him. And now he, Seishirou, was _obsessed_ with death. The thought gave him a curious satisfaction that he never could quite work out.

He thought it might have been perhaps because he knew he would die someday.

It constantly nagged at him, playing like a whisper on the edge of his mind. It gave him a thrill to know he would die one day. He would leave this world behind and discover... what? Anything. There could be anything. He wanted to die, and now he would. There was no doubt in his mind, ever, that Subaru would kill him.

It was the promise she had made. And as soon as she had said it she closed her eyes and slept the dream of death, never to wake again. He knew it was true, he could feel it on the air. The tree she lay under knew it too - the wind stirred the petals so eagerly that he felt the tree spoke, quivering in anticipation of the day. He had never believed his Mother, when she had told him he would die at the hand of the one he loved. No, that long ago he had been an immortal. Capable of delivering death, and incapable of receiving it. But now he knew, and he wondered what it would be like. Would his life flash before his eyes? Would he repeat everything, get to see all the silent pleas from eyes that begged him not to do it? Would he be smiling still, when he died? Would there be pain? He hoped so, if only to taste what it felt like. After all, Subaru seemed to like it so much.

He thought about what he would say to God, if he saw him when he died. Maybe tell God that he had made a few mistakes - that there were so many people who didn't believe any more, it was a wonder He still existed at all. What was the point, after all, if nobody remembered you? Yes, he would talk to God if he had the chance. Walk right up to that throne, if it existed, and look God in the eyes, if He had any, and tell him, _You made some mistakes. And Subaru hates you, did you know that? More than he hates me. Do you care?_ Seishirou looked forward to that day.

_"If you kill Subaru in the same way you have killed me, then that spell will be reflected upon you."_

_"Why would you tell me the meaning of your spell when you have sacrificed your life?"_

_"It would be meaningless if I didn't tell you. Let me trust you this last time. Don't ever invoke this technique."_

_"I'm not the kind of man that you should place your trust in."_

_"I know that. But I believe in you. Don't forget. It is a sin that can't be compensated. There is no one that doesn't have the opportunity to love another. Sei-chan..."_

And so she died. Graceful, laced with white and red and soft petals. She was beautiful, in a different way she had been when she had lived. So he didn't regret killing her. He didn't regret killing anyone, but she was special, and it filled him with something other than his usual apathy. In a while, promised Seishirou, he would follow her. In a while, when Subaru found him.

Seishirou could wait until then. He was good at waiting.


End file.
